May 5, 2005

"Whisper the word goddess and receive a spontaneous 10% discount."

So says an ad for ABC Carpets & Home on page A16 of the paper NYT.

It's a Mother's Day promotion "Celebrating the goddess, the feminine, the woman, the mother." This is a real test of how much you want a 10% discount. You have to sidle up to a carpet salesman and whisper "goddess" to him?

The ad goes on: "give her space, inspire her, adorn her, illuminate her." Apparently, they've lost their minds -- or think we have. Your mother is not a goddess, and, in any case, you can't illuminate her with a carpet.

Carpeting ≠ religion.

18 comments:

Dave said...

ABC Carpet & Home's name is misleading: carpets are a small part of their business.

They are a high-end home furnishing store. I think the allusion is: only a goddess is worth the high prices we charge.

Admittedly, their stuff is very high quality. The few carpets it does sell, for instance, are hand-made Oriental rugs that sell for five figures.

That said, I agree with you that it's over the top and excessive. Of course, many others do not, which is precisely why they'll likely do great business.

Richard Lawrence Cohen said...

I think we would be a wiser, saner, better society if people thought of themselves as human beings. Not goddesses or superheroes or members of this or that specialized group. Just human beings.

Mom Underground said...

This reminds me of a commercial I saw the other day for a new form of the Venus razor. Apparently it vibrates and exfoliates one's legs. The commercial drones on about being a goddess and all sorts of celebrate-one's-inner-goddess crap. It also shows bikini-clad women (with nicely shaved legs) frolicking in salt water. Fresh shave+salt water does not a Goddess-feeling make.

k.s-c said...

Why is it that frolicking, bikini-clad women are used as imagery in a commercial aimed at women? Correct me if I am wrong, but beer commercial approach would not seem to be the most effective.

Besides, it seems that a "goddess" would have more of a self-indulgent life approach. Not cavorting for the benefit of others, but relaxing in a bathrobe or some such thing. (Why did I pick engineering over marketing? I ponder that far too often!)

henny said...

Will they make us scream "Hercules!" on Fathers' Day to further humiliate us? Probably not. I hate all this phony self-esteem raising that they bombard women with. It's degrading.

Ann Althouse said...

ks-c: Women's most sensitive shaving needs are in what is euphemistically called the "bikini area." And once you're in "the area" with something that vibrates, isn't it obvious? It has nothing to do with men.

L. Ron Halfelven said...

And once you're in "the area" with something that vibrates, isn't it obvious?

They say Jane Fonda got a funny feeling every time the guys working on her loft door would fire up the Sawzall...

Doug W. said...

I say it serves you right for gazing upon the "paper NYT." Let that be a lesson to you.

If you must read paper newspapers, the Honolulu Advertiser is way more fun.

Anne Haight said...

Why is it that frolicking, bikini-clad women are used as imagery in a commercial aimed at women? Correct me if I am wrong, but beer commercial approach would not seem to be the most effective.

Men want sexy bikini women. Women want to be sexy bikini women. The message is "use our product and you could look like this and be attractive and happy like this woman."

M. Simon said...

Illuminated carpets are just an idea ahead of their time.

Think OLED.

First the ceilings. Then the walls. Then the floors.

Think of a carpet that can change its stripes.

Think chameleon furniture.

Ann Althouse said...

Anne: "Women want to be sexy bikini women." No, when we women picture ourselves at the beach, here's what we see. I am woman, I am goddess.

lindsey said...

Your Western hegemonic beauty ideals are oppressing me.

TallDave said...

No discussion of carpeting can be complete without a mention of the infamous NIU Library carpet, which will literally give you a headache if you stare at it too long.

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=NIU+LIbrary+carpet

http://crowebar.blogspot.com/2005/04/so-long-ugly.html

The picture really doesn't do it justice, but I'm not sure any picture could. The carpet just has a sort of mind-bending vibe to it, almost like something alive and inimical. When I attended, rumor had it one student inadvertently wandered into the library while on acid and was later taken by ambulance to Kishwaukee Hospital in a twitching, comatose state.

TallDave said...

You thought I was exaggerting, didn't you?

SURVEY RESULTS: General Comments

The service is good...but change the library carpeting!!! It is enough to put a person in a seizure!
Replace the carpets.
Take up the ugly carpet because it makes me dizzy, and that is the main reason I don't like to go in there.
Get new carpeting on the main level when you come in ... its very distracting to the eyes, it makes you not want to stay on that level long.
Services? I have no suggestions....I do have a suggestion about that nuseating carpet though....it needs to go
PLEASE!!!!! Change the carpeting on the ground level of the library. It is embarassing to the public to show our library is so tacky. I also get dizzy spells and sick to myself when I walk across it. AT LEAST on the ground level, please
The carpet in the library gives me a headache. It also smells really bad. There should be better lighting.
Change the carpet. those stripes can give you a headache as you search for items on the shelves. Also, maybe a better directory for locating books on the shelves. Possibly a map including what letters and/or numbers are on the shelves.
Change the carpet, it makes me dizzy. add another computer lab so people have more places to print up their documents. The overall aspect of the library is great. I always seem to get everything accomplished when I come here.
New carpet
New carpet would improve everyone's morale and productivity.
Change the carpet. Have a second computer lab within the library.
Change that AWFUL striped carpeting!!! That stuff gives me a headache! NO JOKE!
Change the carpet.
Change the carpet.
I did not use the NIU library that much. Maybe once in my two year program so I don't have enough knowledge about the library to comment on that. Although, I would highly suggest that someone does something about that carpet!! :) Thanks!
Change the carpet..please.

http://www.niulib.niu.edu/studentsurvey.html

Benton said...

Maybe I'm stretching things a bit but that reminds me a lot of the Da Vinci Code with its focus on the sacred feminine. Could just be that they are trying to appeal to the high end market with a little sense of being "in the know" on the whole Da Vinci code mystery and controversy.

Judith said...

As Stewart Brand said, "We are as gods and may as well get good at it."

(But he also said "Information wants to be free," so what did he know?)

David said...

"..give her space, inspire her, adorn her, illuminate her..."

Two images: yeh, throwing a rug over mom, rolling her up in it and carrying her out to who knows where (a la the mythic Cleopatra meme) will surely "illuminate her."

Or maybe my wife's reaction: the Alladin meme—magic capet ride, "Come fly with me, come fly, come fly away... " Wait, no: That's a different meme...

Richard Fagin said...

You should all be buying ceramic tile and hardwood flooring anyway. Carpet is just not durable enough and is too much trouble to keep clean!