October 11, 2007

Another guy in shorts walking dogs in Brooklyn Heights.

DSC05765.JPG

Analyze.. including the fact that I don't disapprove of this one. There's some exception to my anti-shorts rule to be figured out.

66 comments:

Pogo said...

For one thing, he clearly does not resemble an overgrown toddler.

MadisonMan said...

You were distracted again by broad shoulders.

rhhardin said...

A muscle-bound dog walking service assures the safety of your dog.

AllenS said...

Exception:

Shorts are ok, if they are worn with a t-shirt version of shorts.

rhhardin said...

He's not a bike rider, that's for sure.

Here's an 8000-mile-a-year bike rider with dog :
1, 2, 3.

Note the superior physique.

peter hoh said...

He's got a well-toned physique, and he's doing a job for which shorts are appropriate. And it's warm enough to justify shorts. And he's under 40.

AllenS said...

Another possible exception:

The shorts almost appear to be kilt-like, and you approve of men wearing kilts.

Joseph Hovsep said...

below the knee

ricpic said...

He's got muscles on his muscles
And a big baldy bean.
Is he randy? Does he hustle?
He's a dog walkin' machine.

Jennifer said...

He's hot. That makes most everything ok.

hdhouse said...

let me guess why....

titus22 said...

He's hot. Easy. If you are hot you can wear anything.

You liked his body didn't you?

Admit it girl.

I am afraid he is gay though.

Ann Althouse said...

titus: Don't you get pleasure from the visual world? You can look at everyone.

titus22 said...

I do and he looks especially pleasurable...and gay.

Maybe Dr. Helen can come in and give him therapy to make him straight.

Jennifer said...

How does a person go about looking gay?

Kiley said...

This guy's an exception because he's exceptional. His arms are powerful, his shorts are camo, and he's leading the way. What's not to like?

SGT Ted said...

It's the vaunted Gay-Dar. 'Cause everyone knows that working out and muscle shirts = Teh Ghey.

Or maybe it's like how in certain chic ghey salons they just know that Lincoln was gay, without any real proof.

Ann Althouse said...

titus wants to claim him as gay because he (the shorts guy) looks good.

Jennifer said...

Ah, well in that case I'm going to claim him as a sensitive and romantic heterosexual who loves cooking delicious organic meals and giving foot rubs. That's what he looks like to me.

former law student said...

How does a person go about looking gay?
Wearing a muscle-T, cropping one's hair close to the head, and wearing camo shorts in the city.

AllenS said...

Ann, has anyone gotten close to the exception yet?

Paddy O. said...

Sleeveless t-shirt is a sign, from what I'm told (my gaydar is very poor).

Not a t-shirt, not a tank top. I've been warned off wearing them. Not that I did a lot anyhow.

What's interesting to me is that having spent a little over a week in the midwest again recently I got a better sense for the anti-shorts opinion.

The problem is that shorts are their own style. Relaxed. Casual. Beach and sun. Not serious. They are for activity and exercise and movement. Or otherwise suggesting to the world a carefree attitude.

This isn't only about the shorts themselves, it's about the attitude of the wearer. There's a movement in the body, an expression on the face, a whole accompanying sense of self that shorts need.

Short pants used to be the kinds of things students wore, cut like little suits, often worn with ties and beanies and other formalities. It was the sign of childhood. And now that's carried on still. Shorts cut like half-pants, worn with a shirt that would fit with dockers and often on a person who doesn't really know what to do with themselves outside the office or off the couch.

Shorts demand a certain kind of arrogance, saying to the world that the formalities are no longer needed. It is a rejection of convention, not an adaptation. Bad shorts wearing, the kind I saw a lot in the midwest and not so much here in SoCal, lacked that arrogant insouciance. Legs that should be seen show a muscular structure and reflect in an overall athletic gait.

Pastor_Jeff said...

Surely it's not his massively bulging ... fanny pack?

David53 said...

This manly man is definitely not gay. His submissive dogs are walking behind him, not in front of him. He has way too much body hair on his legs, arms, and back of his neck. His fanny pack is messy and unzipped, his visible shoe is dirty, and he appears to have a large stain on his shirt. He doesn't seem to care much about how he looks. He's probably back home on leave from Iraq.

P. D. "Bo" Steele said...

The exception is that in NYC yesterday, it was a very hot day.

And the man is under 40.

Pastor_Jeff said...

Just moments ago, a squirrel tried to run up his leg and attack him. Unprotected by the lack of pants material, the evil rodent was sent to an early grave by the quick-thinking man.

Shorts can save your life!

LetMeSpellItOutForYou said...

When this post popped up in my feed reader, the title alarmed me so much that I searched for other recent mentions of "shorts." A couple of weekends ago, I too was walking around my old stomping grounds Brooklyn Heights while wearing shorts. I'd hate to think that one of my favorite bloggers would be so offended as to hold me up to public ridicule. Shorts are way, way down the list of fashion choices I'd find remarkable in New Yorkers I pass on the street.

Ann Althouse said...

I'm not ridiculing this guy. I like him.

Karl said...

His legs are shaved.

-kd

LetMeSpellItOutForYou said...

"I'm not ridiculing this guy. I like him." Perhaps, but you almost certainly would not have liked me.

Ralph said...

He's not wearing socks. Wish I had calves (and other parts) like that.

NSC said...

Hmm, was he running (exercising) with the dogs before or after you took the shot? Seems like a good exception to me.

tjl said...

He's in enviable shape. Combined with the haircut, it's highly gaydar-activating. He's exempt from the Althouse no-shorts rule because in this case he's actually an improvement to the streetscape.

The middle dog appears to be a Westie, the most appealing of all terrier breeds.

rhhardin said...

The fashion question of the day is, the weather having turned cold, whether wool socks are suitable with crocs.

I'd hate to give up comfortable shoes just because it's winter, unless fashion requires it.

Jennifer said...

Crocs are never suitable. Once you've gone and strapped the ugly plastic to your feet, wear whatever the heck socks you want.

LetMeSpellItOutForYou said...

"[I]n this case he's actually an improvement to the streetscape." Brooklyn Heights is one of America's most attractive neighborhoods, and not even the best-looking gay guy can improve on it.

BTW, to me the military-style shorts signals he's hetero. As for the fanny pack, I'm not so sure.

Kiley said...

The image of a pumped-up strapping man next to a beefy, burly iron newel post and good-looking black security fencing just works somehow. The froufrou dogs are like the pretty sharp points on the balusters.

We feel safe. And a little endangered.

Darkbloom said...

I don't know about him, but that dog on the right definitely looks gay to me.

Blake said...

Jennifer sees a chimera.

Ralph said...

How can people wear plastic shoes? I find nylon fabric to be unbearably unbreathable.

former law student said...

Although I was wrong on the italian greyhounds, I'm going to guess the middle dog is a bichon frise. I cannot find a rear view on the web, so try to imagine this: http://www.littlepawz.com/dog_images/bichon.jpg

titus22 said...

He is gay because he has many of the requirements:

1) shaved head
2) he dresses well
3) he works out like a dog
4) his job is a dog walker
5) the camaflouge shorts are a giveaway
6) his shirt is especially tight, most straight guys don't wear they shirts that tight.
7) he is also tucked in

I can smell it a mile away girl. Trust the gay to identify the gay.

I was 100 for 100 on the "Euro trash or Gay" site and lets face it if I can identify a gay from euro trash their gay.

titus22 said...

A fanny pack would definitely not be gay but he does have to pick up the shit of three dogs so he needs to have plenty of bags which is why he has the fancy pack.

Also, you can tell by his posture and his stride. His shoulders are rolled back, head up. He is proud, confident and he should be, he is hot and gay.

Also, many gays like the hairy. Do any of you read Sullivan? There is a huge bear movement with the gays. Gays don't generally do anything with hair on their arms or legs, maybe light trimming.

For the person who said just back from Iraq that is problem the look this gay is hoping for.

titus22 said...

The guy walking towards him is definitely not gay.

titus22 said...

Did he make you a little horny????

Kiley said...

Oh, he's hetero. You can tell by the ears. He sends Xmas cards to his ma every year. You can tell by how he's not dragging the dogs. And he's a Marine who did a tour in Iraq or Afghanistan by his not realizing his showy muscular get-up and cute dogs would turn on gays.

He just thinks he walking some mutts for money.

tjl said...

"he's a Marine who did a tour in Iraq or Afghanistan"

He would like others to think so!

Ex-marines are not exactly thick on the ground walking dogs in Brooklyn Heights.

titus22 said...

I didn't think Brooklyn Heights would be a hot spot of previous marines who were in Afghanistan or Iraq.

Maybe he is in military drag. The gays love the military look.

There is an entire website dedicated to actual straight marines doing it-activeduty-they are the real thing. But they all have southern accents.

He's gay girl and I don't even need to see the front.

I think Althouse wants to claim his as one of your team but he's not, sorry.

Also, he is the first male dogwalker I have ever seen. All the dogwalkers in Chelsea are women, primarily latins, go figure.

There is a great new calendar out of gay athletes at colleges throughout the country. You all need to check it out. The swimming captain of MIT is to die for and the football player from Harvard is lovely and the rugby player from Dartmouth is too much. They have some fish too but I breezed by them. The young people really don't give a crap about the gays anymore-that's hot.

Now I am horny and the weather sucks so I can't even take a little walkey to see what I am worth. I could go to the gym for a little steamroom action but that is a pain in the ass-it gets so hot in their and I start to look like a turnip. Also, sadly I am going to have to put away the tankeys for the season.

Fall is all about form fitting long sleeve t's. You heard it hear first girl. The sleeves should be rolled up right at the elbow with a completely silver watch-tag or rolex is fine. The fall pant is old school corduroy this year but in the same color as blue jeans. Low riders, button down narrow cuffs and either prada t-shoes or something sporty like diesel t-shoes. Pumas are out. The market has been saturated with them. Whatever you do don't wear your pumas-even the cute black leather ones with the white stripe.

Also, the new big tshirt is "Ask me about my Wide Stance" or "I have a Wide Stance" or just "Wide Stance". I have only seen a few so far so it is still cool to wear them but pretty soon it will be a faux pas because again saturated market.

Another hot tshirt in Chelsea is "Massachusetts Liberal"-tight of course with arms bulging. Get it in white with black lettering.

Also, you can never have enough shoes, belts and bobbles-I got that from Ab Fab.

Ann, do you ever watch Ab Fab? It's old but still hilarious and Camille is into it again so it must be cool.

titus22 said...

Also, I try to be empathetic with my housecleaners, because I care.

My last housekeepers were Indians from India and I always told them I loved the movie Monsoon Wedding. Just wanted them to know I cared. They moved back to India.

My new housecleaners are originally from Tibet and it is a husban and wife both named Tenzin-how weird is that. What I am doing for them is putting out, the book by the Dali Lama, "Ethics for the New Millenium. And with the Burma crisis I let them know I am with them in the fight.

These are the little things I do with my housecleaners that I think make a nice difference.

One thing, though is that my house cleaners can never be here when I am here. I don't want to see them clean my toilet. They respect my wishes and call when they are coming and going.

Lastly, my blackberry died this afternoon and I am a mess. I am addicted and I may have missed some very important emails from work.

I will be back. I hope this is informative for all of you.

Oh and traffic is a nightmare right now the horns are driving me crazy.

Tonight is going to be ordering Thai in and maybe a little drinkey winkey.

Tell me about yourself?

titus22 said...

With my Tibetan cleaners I may just put a little not out for them that says, "Go Monks", to let them know that I am with them.

I think what this says is that I am with them. I feel really good about it.

Ralph said...

He's not (recent) military, the tan is all wrong, that is, it's not a shirt tan. Those are the strangest pants--the right side is camouflaged, the left looks like tiger stripes and other stuff.

Ralph said...

These are the little things I do with my housecleaners that I think make a nice difference.
Dunno, your last ones ran home, half way 'round the world. But maybe they thought you cared too much.

titus22 said...

before someone slams me sorry about my spellings of "their" and "hear"-wow that was bad.

Also, during the holidays this is what I give my service providers:

Housecleaners (who come every other week): $500

Hair Burner (who I go to once a month): $200.00

Masseuse (go to monthly) $200.00

Peddy/Manny (quarterly) $100.00

Yoga Instructor (weekly) $100.00
He's got me in a fierce downward facing dog

Chiropracter: $100.00

Doctor: $100.00 dinner certificate

Dentist: $100.00 dinner certificate

Acupuncturist: $100.00

Doggy Day Care provider: $250.00

Doggy Beautician: $100.00

Employees who report to me (5) $100.00 dinner certificates.

I am thinking of revising these number for this season but not sure. Any suggestions?

former law student said...

Those are the strangest pants--the right side is camouflaged, the left looks like tiger stripes and other stuff.

I'm gonna guess that on the left we see a navy bandana handkerchief hanging from the pocket.

Hey titus: is there still a gay handkerchief code?

Ralph said...

If the yoga guy is hung, he obviously deserves more. Doctor and Dentist may see themselves as professionals--send them a card, not a gift, unless you know them socially and they reciprocate.
What's a hair burner?

Kiley said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ralph said...

fls, I enlarged the photo and I still can't tell. Maybe it's a plastic bag hanging down from the fanny pack.

Jennifer said...

I've begun to think it's a large applique patch of a flower or something. Maybe Titus is right.

Kiley said...

The particulars don't matter when the main impression is that this guy is an alpha male and the pooches are betas or bitches.

Best subliminal unintended: that man in the background walking behind the woman looks as if he's using her as a shield---.

former law student said...

What's a hair burner?

Even though I'm no metrosexual, I'm pretty sure a hair burner is titus's personal hedgetrimmer.

downtownlad said...

I was going to comment here, but titus has already said everything that needs to be said.

Don't you tip your super? You need to tip your super.

titus22 said...

The super of the building is given a gift certificate combined by all of the tenants. I don't like him but contribute 50.00 along with everyone else. There are 50 units in the building so he does pretty good.

My sense is the gay handkerchief/bandana is gone. I haven't seen it in any of the places I have been to in the past year and I have been to just about every sleazy disgusting place you could imagine. I have seen things that no human should witness. I have been to "circuit parties" although I dont go anymore and they have a huge stage where people do sexual acts you wouldn't think are humanly possible.

I think the gay hankies went out in the 80's.

blogging cockroach said...

glad titus has tibetan
housecleaners

he's sure getting
good karma
with those little
kindnesses

i show you suffering
and the end of
suffering
sez the buddha

Ralph said...

We haven't yet learned the exception(s) for men in shorts. Some of us need to know if we'll pass.

Daryl said...

He doesn't have the weak-little-boy look going and he's not a hairy cave-dweller. His limbs are aesthetically pleasing, so it's okay to show them off. I cracked the code!

Galvanized said...

Maybe your exception to the shorts rule is that he's involved in a semi-athletic activity for which comfort and coolness are necessary. It's that he's not dressed this way for vanity/fashion's sake. For instance, I'm sure you accept men wearing shorts to work out at the gym and wouldn't expect them to always wear sweatpants. Yeah, that's it. :)