March 18, 2008

"You've made me feel very uncomfortable, because I now feel that you're all broken birds."

Said Simon Cowell to Carly Smithson after she explained why the lyrics of the Beatles' "Blackbird" — "take these broken wings and learn to fly" — seemed to her to apply to her efforts to make it in the music industry. Well, we all have our interpretations. Hers may be dumb, but would that Charles Manson had viewed it as such blandly reassuring fare. But the reason I'm posting about this segment of tonight's "American Idol" is that when Simon was saying that he was pinching and twisting his own nipples and making a crazy orgasm face. Here's the best TiVo frame of Simon's moment with his body:

DSC08039

Look, you can see that Paula Abdul is all what the hell are you doing!

DSC08042

Sorry for the graininess... and horrifying grossness.

20 comments:

George said...

I condemn, in unequivocal terms, the statements of Professor Althouse that cause such controversy....

...Professor Althouse's comments are not only wrong but divisive, divisive at a time when we need unity; sexually charged at a time when we need to come together...

Given my background, my politics, and my professed values and ideals, there will no doubt be those for whom my statements of condemnation are not enough....

Meade said...

Oh no no... I think your statements of condemnation are quite enough thank you.

Ann Althouse said...

Maybe if Obama had done that during the speech it would have been more effective!

Rick Lee said...

How funny... I was watching but I didn't notice Simon doing that. Weird. I was really surprised at so many boner performances tonight. I guess part of the problem is that these kids just don't know these songs at all. I was especially surprised at Brooke who just totally blew it. *shrug*

TMink said...

I seem to recall Paul saying that Blackbird was about the civil rights movement.

Trey

Zeb Quinn said...

It was a mistake to have another Beatles night.

Joe said...

One of the biggest mistakes contestants make every season is picking songs for sentimental reasons instead of a combination of showcasing their talent and entertaining the audience.

One very annoying thing tonight was how many of the singers were boring or really sucked--a few were hopelessly off key--but were praised. Others were pretty good, but were damned.

Every year this happens, but for some reason it seems more egregious this year. I have the feeling they desperately want to avoid the embarrassment of having hacks make it to the final stages.

Michael_H said...

Wouldn't you think with all the money Cowell makes that he could afford to hire a nipple tweaker?

http://saltyt.antville.org/stories/185853/

Susan said...

This was the first time I was really moved by Carly Smithson's singing.And does anyone else think of Boy George when they see her?
I mean Carly
Smithson
/Boy
George
: separated at birth.

Pogo said...

Ack; how grotesque.
Thus is reinforced my effort to never ever watch American Idol.

ricpic said...

Cowell, like 90% of our celebrity culture, is on drugs, guaranteed.

knoxwhirled said...

The most uncomfortable moment for me was when that blonde girl said to Simon "I can blow your socks off, you know I can!" erm, wrong word choice.

DIdn't notice Simon's weird gesturing. I'll have to see if it's still on the DVR.

Ann Althouse said...

Knoxwhirled, yes, and it was terrible that everyone laughed leeringly until the last person in the home audience got it and the poor girl was horrified.

Susan, yes, I've been thinking that myself. I also don't enjoy her singing. The closeups did her no favors: she looked as though she found singing painful.

MadisonMan said...

Carly's eyes and Boy George's Eyes. That's the similarity. Do you really want to hurt her by voting her off?

The Aussie Guy was dreadful. What a bad song to choose -- and I'm sorry, choosing it because his dead friend liked it? Doesn't work for me.

Trooper York said...

Simon’s nipple manipulation has been the subject of several prior comments, along with Paula clapping like a seal and Randy’s gender confusion as who to call a dude and Ryan and Simons continual flirting with each other as they imitate Titus and the Greek delivery boy with a platter full of humus.

The only chance for the cowgirl is to blow somebody, but I don’t think Ryan or Simon are into that with girls, and Randy hasn’t seen his penis since 1986 so I don’t think he would have any sensation as his penis has basically become vestigial. Ms. Mercardo put the girls on display to get the horny teenage boy vote and my little Filipina cutie ended the show as the perfect little midget love object. Most of the guys did enough to slide by and are safe for the moment. So tonight either the cowgirl gets the blues or we finally see the back of Amanda Oversinger

MadisonMan said...

Amanda seems to be a one-trick pony, so she's definitely in danger -- right ahead of The Horse Whisperer KL Cook. I think when you're always in the bottom 3, eventually your luck runs out, whatever your fellating skills.

Triangle Man said...

Amanda is certainly a one-trick pony, but she is also the darling of votefortheworst.com and may have enough support there to last another couple of weeks. She's no Sanjaya though.

Chip Ahoy said...

Autotittweeking is disgusting !!11!!!111111eleventy111!!! About as silly as attaching clothes pins to them, the kind with sturdy springs.

Frank Longo, crossword constructor, has a favorite game he likes to play in chat, because he always wins. You say two consecutive words in the entire Beatles catalog and he finishes the line. This is quite a feat considering he was born after the Beatles broke up.

Ann Althouse said...

"Frank Longo, crossword constructor, has a favorite game he likes to play in chat, because he always wins. You say two consecutive words in the entire Beatles catalog and he finishes the line. This is quite a feat considering he was born after the Beatles broke up."

There used to be some on-line chat board or email list I was on where that game was played. That was back before you could easily search for lyrics on line. I could do that and so could my son John, who is 27, and knows much more about the Beatles than I do, even though I experienced it all in real time. Apparently, many of the things I "know" are wrong. For example, there isn't an album called "Something New" -- even though I could show you the physical object.

SteveR said...

I have the same physical object, so there's at least two of us.

Not a good night but it wasn't the Beatles' fault.