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It is at times like this, while being eaten alive by insane jealousy, that I have to take a deep, cleansing breath and remind myself that Dave Barry has talent and makes a lot of money.
HUG ME PILLOWThe Hug Me Pillow seems to be marketed mainly for women. We think this is a fine invention and look forward to improved models that, in addition to hugging you, can snore and occasionally emit bursts of flatulence. Then there would be no need for men at all.I love Dave.
Hey wait, this stuff is real.I like the idea of the Hug Me Pillow. You can buy it for the wife or girlfriend and put it in her bed like the horse head in The Godfather.As a warning.
Whomever you give a Holiday Gift Guide item to, that person will never want to exchange gifts with you again.That sounds wrong. I could probably come up with some analysis proving that it has to be ``whoever.''Either an elided ``Whoever it is..,'' or ``Whoever you give ... to will never'' in apposition to ``that person'' as subject.The proper point of the study of grammar is figuring out why things sound wrong.
The hug me pillow solves the post-coital ``hold me'' problem.
If you added motion activated audio to number 11, it could be a great addition to a home security system.
You would think that the hug me pillow would only make the user feel even more lonely. No longer simply alone, he is now mocked in his condition by a false hand and dead embrace. Ill-conceived.
And now I feel like a jerk because I went to read the reviews for the hug me pillow on Overstock, and while most of them were funny, one was from a widowed person who uses it to feel less alone at night. :( That is too sad for a hug me pillow review.
Then by all means, let's get happy."Hold Me Tight."It feels so right now, hold me tight.Tell me I'm the only one. And then I might, never be the lonely one.
Think of the money wackos of all political stripes could save on tinfoil with the Head Spa Massager!
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