January 13, 2011

News alert from the NYT: When you cheat on your spouse, the spouse especially hates it when you do it in "the marital bed."

Well, all right then. So much for the old "I was trying to save money." Hotels are expensive! You'd think she'd appreciate your economizing, but apparently not. Experts say! I mean, a few divorce lawyers anecdotalize.

28 comments:

Scott M said...

A sleeping bag on the living room floor serves the same exact purpose and, let's face it. Infidelity sex can get a lot more...gymnastic. The level plane and extra room can come in handy.

Make whatever you like of those last three words.

Bender said...

What's the big deal? What two consenting adults do in private is nobody's business.

After all, marriage is just a piece of paper. It doesn't have any real meaning, other than whatever a person wants to give it. And if that means cheating and treating the other spouse like a piece of sh*t, so what?

Bender said...

"what infuriated his wife the most was where he had often made love to his girlfriend: their marriage bed."

Let's get this straight right now -- there isn't any "love" involved here. I really don't expect the morally twisted and confused NYT to understand, but doing something like this is the antithesis of love, it is the counterfeit of love.

dbp said...

In discussions like this with my wife, her primary concern is discresion: She would really not like to know and would be doubly pissed if I admitted to it.

She has a point. If a guy is feeling guilty, then isn't it pure selfishness to unburden himself at his wife's expense?

coketown said...

If I were told my spouse cheated on me in our bed, I still think the infidelity would be the bigger disappointment.

But if you must, try the kitchen table. Then there's only one sheet to wash and lemon Pledge usually takes care of the scuff marks.

Steve M. Galbraith said...

You women and your demands.

Talk about high maintenance...

Lucien said...

Even if "anecdotalize" were a real word, it shoudn't be. It belongs in its own little corner of word hell, along with "impactfully", "incent" (as a verb), and "mentor-mentee relationship."

WV: hingef -- the worst grade given to a carpenter in door-hanging class

X said...

It's also extremely stupid. If there is one place that a license to kill exists, that's probably it.

Meade said...

@Lucien: Haven't you heard? Failing roof beams fall on the unhinged and hinged alike.

dbp said...

Youv'e got that right Comrade X.

If my wife caught me in bed, she would calmly reach into the bedside stand, remove what is there and shoot me in the head. Hopefully, the head shot would be the first and only shot, rather than the last of many.

d-day said...

You need a "NYT is for the ladies" tag!

Toad Trend said...

"Sometimes, It May Be About the Bed"

LMAO.

Its really not. For most. Its about screwing someone your not supposed to.

wv - porequ

What I was doing when my wife caught us

David said...

"When he and his girlfriend go to use the bed for the first time, they see his wife has carved the girlfriend’s name in the headboard: “S-L-U-T.”

Which, of course, the slut turned to her immediate advantage, right there in the marital bed, once again proving to him why he was wise to choose her."

Ann Althouse said...

"You need a "NYT is for the ladies" tag!"

Oh, I do have a "news for women" tag. Thanks for reminding me.

Ann Althouse said...

"A sleeping bag on the living room floor serves the same exact purpose and, let's face it. Infidelity sex can get a lot more...gymnastic. The level plane and extra room can come in handy."

Oh! I thought I was reading the comments in the Forever Lazy post. Now that I realize where I am, I'd just like to say you could zip your honey inside the Forever Lazy with you. Very easy to wash afterwards too.

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

This song was a hit in all Latinamerica in the 80s:
Que barbaridad
lo que tú me has hecho
entregarte a otro
en mi propio lecho.Usaste el cepillo,
mi propio jabón
y la intimidad
de mi habitacíónEso le pasa al
que lleva amigo a su casaQué descaro tuvoel que fue tu amante,
usar mi mujery mi desodorante,
ESE BARBARAZO ACABO ON TOSe afeitó la barbaen mi tocador
me dañó la radioy el televisor

Anonymous said...

Guess you better take it out back, Meade.

Unknown said...

dbp and Comrade X invoke what is known in the South as The Unwritten Law, most of whose beneficiaries, ironically, seem to have been the aggrieved wife.

Instead of what's in the night table, however, The Unwritten Law, having been provoked by what was being mounted in the marital bed, seems to have been invoked with what was mounted over the mantle.

Messy.

traditionalguy said...

"When you" commit adultery is when you no longer have a spouse. You may remarry, but otherwise you have broken off the marriage.

jr565 said...

What? I can't sleep with your best friend in our marrage bed?
It aint me babe, it aint me you're looking for babe.
Go lightly from the ledge, babe
Go lightly on the ground
I'm not the one you want, babe
I'll only let you down
You say you're lookin' for someone
Who'll promise never to part
Someone to close his eyes to you
Someone to close his heart
Someone to die for you and more

The Drill SGT said...

edutcher said...
dbp and Comrade X invoke what is known in the South as The Unwritten Law


The South AND the West

Smart DA's take the case to the Grand Jury. That lets them off the hook on a losing case.

R.L. Hunter said...

The bed thing works both ways

Jeff with one 'f' said...

I thought they especially hated it when you cheat on the kitchen table....

Ignorance is Bliss said...

When you cheat on your spouse, the spouse especially hates it when you do it in "her sister."

The Crack Emcee said...

"When you cheat on your spouse, the spouse especially hates it when you do it in "the marital bed."

Yea, I prefer when it be done on the TV.

Clyde said...

This whole article reminds me of one of David Allan Coe's X-rated songs (the one with the stained pillow in the middle of the bed). It's most definitely not work safe, if you go looking for it on YouTube.

madAsHell said...

From the article....

"That was the case with two married women with children in Westchester County, who had an affair for years. At least until one of the husbands came home unexpectedly and found the two together in bed."

...and this is grounds for divorce?

It should be one more off the bucket list!!