February 12, 2011

"It's most likely an industrial-type diamond, not gem quality."

If you scorn the merchandise enough, can you get out of the felony range... if you're Lindsay Lohan?

ADDED: You know who I feel sorry for? Jewelers. Here is is, 2 days before Valentine's Day, and you know they're hoping guys will run in and pay $950 and up for something that looks like the sort of thing that might make a woman feel that he didn't fuck up. And just at that moment, the clueless males of this world are getting an insider's tip: The junk in those stores isn't worth anywhere near what you see on the price tags. Diamonds? You Valentine's Day chumps need to know there are mere industrial-type diamonds, and you have no idea what you're buying, do you?

Here, buy a diamond necklace — see how cheap they are?

31 comments:

PETER V. BELLA said...

This is getting old. Just put her in prison. Oh, it's Hollywood. Stars are immune.

kent said...

can you get out of the felony range... if you're Lindsay Lohan?

If doing Machete can't legally be held against her... then Lohan ain't never gonna do hard time.

edutcher said...

Unless something really gets inside her head and she straightens herself out, I'm betting she's the next Anna Nicole Smith.

WV "aduche" (no kidding) No, she's more to be pitied than censured.

The Drill SGT said...

Just because somebody says it's worth nothing does that mean it's free?

seriously, the market decides the price. if the DA can show that the store has records of selling it above $950, then that's the value.

I loved this one:

-- A downtown L.A. jeweler says if the item is retailing for $2,500, it means "the stone is cheap," adding, "It's most likely an industrial-type diamond, not gem quality." He says the necklace is worth no more than $900.

this guy is making a distinction about his entire industry. Things that retail for 2500 are not worth more than 900 max.

LOL

Bender said...

Proof of value from a merchant, as in a shoplifting type of case, is typically accomplished merely by introducing the price tag or indicator of what it was offered for sale at.

If the prosecution were required to bring in expert witnesses, who have done extensive market analysis, in every case, very few cases would ever be able to go forward.

Interesting though, if they are arguing value, that must mean they are conceding that she took it.

In any event, in Virginia, the felony threshold is $200. A measely $200 will put you at risk of 20 years in prison. And it has been at that low price since 1998. With inflation, what was a misdemeanor yesterday for a given article is a felony today.

Palladian said...

Diamonds are boring. I demand rubies and emeralds.

Or even more impressive, a strand of matched, natural pearls, far rarer and more expensive than your average gemstone.

Cedarford said...

Bender - "In any event, in Virginia, the felony threshold is $200. A measely $200 will put you at risk of 20 years in prison. And it has been at that low price since 1998. With inflation, what was a misdemeanor yesterday for a given article is a felony today."

Good point. In another 5-10 years, walking out of Olive Garden without paying for a meal could be a felony in Virginia.

And out in California, talk of throwing Lohan in jail for many years for something that could be misdeamor theft - is in the context of judges ordering convicted murderers sprung from jail due to overcrowding.

Christy said...

Whew! Thank goodness I've always considered diamonds tacky.

Tyrone Slothrop said...

Seriously, Professor, you feel sorry for the jewelers? This is the most artificial market ever to exist, with men being told by the retailer how much and when they have to spend. Women are taking up the cudgel on the retailer's behalf, with young women being told to believe there is some kind of ancient tradition here. The ancient tradition is about twenty years old, and the goods-- low quality diamonds-- have virtually no intrinsic value.

This doesn't get LiLo off the hook, though, because as long as there are enough morons out there willing to pay big bucks for these trinkets, then big bucks is what the market value of the trinkets is, and that should form the basis of how the statute is applied to Lindsay Lohan.

PaulV said...

DA should go after jeweler for felony fraud. Lawyers often argue in alternative. True value of item to merchant is his replacement cost. His insurer would never pay retail.

edutcher said...

Just clicked the new link. Now, every time I go to Amazon and my "favorites" come up, The Blonde is going to start getting ideas.

William said...

Lindsay Lohan is herself the kind of zircon jewel that you get when you put bullshit under tectonic pressures.

Bruce Hayden said...

I am no expert here, just working off of what girlfriends have told me, but I doubt that it was industrial. Maybe manufactured, but likely not industrial.

What I don't understand is why and how they keep the price of non-manufactured diamonds so much above that of manufactured, when the big criteria within a weight seems to be how close it is to perfect. So, we seem to have the situation where the nearer the diamond is to perfect, the more expensive it is, unless it really is (almost) perfect, and then its value drops significantly.

If there is any truth to the above, then I think that the market for real gem diamonds will ultimately crash. It is too hard to non-jewelers to tell the difference between a good gem diamond and a manufactured one, esp. at a distance, and so women will be able to easily have the appearance of having a wealthy boyfriend/husband without having the reality by cheating.

DaveW said...

She got busted for shop lifting? I had no idea. What's a presumably affluent actress like her doing shoplifting a necklace? At a jewelry store? Crazy.

She needs to be in treatment for whatever her psychological issues are rather than just for drug use or whatever else she's been getting in trouble over.

traditionalguy said...

More and more stores now show a price tag for impressing the naive and then always sell it for half as much. Joseph A Bank men's clothes are sold that way. On the other hand, a Costco price is low but it never goes lower. IMO these valentine doodads are not worth anything...stick to giving her a dozen long stem red roses, dinner and a show for about the same total price.

Michael said...

"She needs to be in treatment for whatever her psychological issues are rather than just for drug use or whatever else she's been getting in trouble over"

Better still she needs to sit in jail with other felons.

Fen said...

What's a presumably affluent actress like her doing shoplifting a necklace? At a jewelry store? Crazy

My understanding is that the necklace was loaned to her by the store for some celeb event (common practice) and she didn't return it by the agreed upon time.

Regardless, I hope the judge makes an object lesson out of Lohan.

Max punishment as allowed under the law, no parole. And no country-club prison either.

Paddy O said...

Diamonds are boring. I demand rubies and emeralds.

This is exactly what I was going to say.

Indeed, this is what my now wife said, and that's why she got a ruby engagement/wedding ring.

Diamonds are for people who need to be told what they should like and how they should feel valued.

LYNNDH said...

I have bought my wife several diamonds. The most expensive was her engagement ring, at $300. It is irreplaceable. Also the diamonds from my Mom's diamonds that now sit on either side of it.

chuckR said...

Other than industrial uses, cutting/grinding/polishing, diamonds have no use other than being portable should the SHTF and you need to flee. Even then, you'll get pennies on the dollar - in whatever currency is used where you wind up. The Atlantic did an article on the diamond trade in the 1980's. One of the biggest scams there is. Glad the wife liked opal - and that in the (cheaper) triplet form so she could wear it in a ring without fear of damaging it.

Fun fact, diamond has a thermal conductivity five times better than silver, which is next best. Also has very low friction. How you can use this information practically, I have no idea. Been kicked around for quite a while.

Tyrone Slothrop said...

chuckR said...

Fun fact, diamond has a thermal conductivity five times better than silve


Interesting-- I didn't know that. That should mean it also has excellent electrical conductivity, since electrical conductivity is proportional to thermal conductivity. You could make transparent wires.

Freeman Hunt said...

I could see a piece of jewelry costing tens of thousands of dollars being loaned out, but a $2500 necklace to a Hollywood actress? And then she steals it?!

Cheapskate city.

Big Mike said...

We have wall-mounted flat screen TVs tuned to CNN in our company cafeteria, and they posted a poll where people by almost 9:1 said that Lindsay Lohan should not go to jail.

I guess this goes along with somebody urging that we ignore laws against possession of marijuana because, hey!, it's Willie Nelson. (No, Professor, I'm not gonna let you forget about that one.)

Back during the Watergate hearings we had to put up with Democrats pontificating as to how no one is above the law. In 37 years it's become, well [little tap dancing], ya know [little more tap dancing], it's just Lindsay Lohan, or it's just Willie Nelson, or it's just Roman Polanski so it wasn't really rape, or it's just Wild Willie Clinton lying about sex (or was the defense that oral sex isn't really sex, its title notwithstanding?).

Is there a point where the United States can get back to being, at least nominally, a country of laws and not a country where who you are and who you know counts for more than what's in the law?

Or shall we just bring back vigilance committees?

ironrailsironweights said...

diamonds have no use other than being portable should the SHTF and you need to flee

Easiest things in the world to conceal (gulp!)

Retrieval is a bit more troublesome.

Peter

Maguro said...

Feel sorry for the jewelers? Never. Can't stand the constant barrage of jewelery commercials this time of the year.

I would be particularly chuffed if I never had to watch another ad for Jared the Galleria of Jewelery.

traditionalguy said...

Free Lindsey! A civil case is a better choice than a criminal charge unless the proof is clear. The owners must have been told by the police that the prosecutors and the judge would go all the way against this well known but rebellious celebrity.

Toledo said...

Speaking of stars being immune, what happened to Willie Nelson?

Is he still running around loose after being busted for dope?

John Henry

John said...

Speaking of stars being immune, what happened to Willie Nelson?

Is he still running around loose after being busted for dope?

John Henry

Firehand said...

A: There's a reason Kim du Toit used to refer to it as 'the diamond racket'.
B: This celebritute hasn't managed to off herself yet? I'm amazed.

And, yeah, completely out of sympathy too.

SGT Ted said...

The diamond trade is one of the biggest scams ever and it is entirely due to womens obsessive cumpulsion that equates compressed carbon with love, simply because it costs so much.

If a woman were given the cash instead, she'd think you considered her to be a whore.

Revenant said...

Speaking of stars being immune, what happened to Willie Nelson? Is he still running around loose after being busted for dope?

I sure hope so.