February 27, 2012

"I fell in love with Benihana because, if you sit at a table full of strangers and you don't say anything to anybody..."

"... you're an asshole...."
So, [Tracy Morgan] says he started using the restaurant regularly as a way to try out jokes on the public. "You've got a built-in audience. It's like a small comedy show, and this is the stage."

As we're talking, Morgan notices a guy at the next table listening. When asked what he likes about the vibe, Morgan answers loudly, for the other guy's benefit....
Go to the link for the — warning: offensive — routine.

32 comments:

traditionalguy said...

The steak and lobster combo please. And I'll start with a carafe of hot sake.

Rliyen said...

Like I have anything to say to the white trash sitting next to me asking stupid fucking questions like, "Iz Dis Chi-neeze food?"

Fuck Morgan.

Bill said...

I have fond memories of going to a similar place when I was much younger. The last several times I've been very disappointed. They often cram up to 12 people at a table meant for 8. Even if you specifically make arrangements for a table for your large group, they'll throw some poor couple in with you to sit there awkwardly while you try to make small talk. I get it that part of the experience is to interact with people you don't know but I don't really like to do that and I don't like to be thought of as an asshole for not liking to do that so I don't go. It's a shame too, because the food is usually pretty good.

Peano said...
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Andrea said...

I used to love Benihana when I was younger - it became the place my dad would take me for my birthday -- but as I grew older and more misanthropic I decided I didn't care much for the whole communal eating experience. Give me my own table where I can read my book in peace.

traditionalguy said...

We went on Friday nights for some time. The Tables were often families celebrating a child's birthday or other family event. You can usually join in and make a friendly comment or two.

Once we had an oriental family at the table. The local resident Asians were entertaining their visitors straight from China/Japan/Taiwan.

The oriental visitors not yet being adapted to the USA were so super polite that it was hard to have any common table fellowship.

Jennifer said...

I guess I've never been to Benihana. I have eaten teppanyaki though, and I'm not a fan. It's like having a trained monkey at the table. The other people at the table wouldn't bother me, but the flippity-doo chef really does.

tim maguire said...

I once made the mistake of going to a Tracy Morgan show. No talent hack.

At the end, when nobody clapped (we were all too busy yawning), he decided the proper response was to insult the audience.

He doesn't have to go to Banihana to be an asshole. He can be an asshole anywhere.

Freeman Hunt said...

The things you learn everyday.

I didn't know people held passionate dislike for Tracy Morgan.

What is so controversial about him?

Steve Koch said...

30 Rock is the only place I ever see Tracy. He is funny on 30 Rock but I love 30 Rock. Cool idea to use Benihana as a place to try out jokes.

The Crack Emcee said...

Tracy has his good moments and bad - and both are extremes.

Went to a Japanese steakhouse recently and was amazed by the dexterity of the chef - he threw an egg in the air, with the knife, then caught it on the same knife before flipping it up again to split it in two on the knife's edge. Wow. It takes a lot to impress me, but that did it:

I knew I was in good hands.

The food was great, too!

Peano said...
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bagoh20 said...

I love Benihana. It taste good, it's casual, it's usually entertaining and we love to watch someone cook while we're eating at a big setting table. It's deep in our caveman brains. It's like a barbecue without the sunburn, and you can leave as soon as you're full.

I generally don't say anything to strangers either. I accept that this makes me an asshole, but you need to remember that while extroverts get energy from interacting with people, introverts get drained. To us, the rest of you are all vampires and zombies. You're lucky we don't just shoot you in the head on sight. Respect our quietness - the comedy is someone else's job.

Freeman Hunt said...

I suppose there's just no accounting for taste.

None of that is particularly shocking within the bounds of stand up comedy.

Is the passionate dislike of Morgan really a passionate dislike of stand up comedy?

Bill said...

Everyone should see that episode of 30 Rock, though. How could you not educate yourself about the legend of Leap Day Williams?!

Peano said...
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MadisonMan said...

I've never been to Benihana -- I don't want to eat with strangers. I prefer a little bit of quiet, and not forced conversation.

Not one for small talk.

LordSomber said...

The "onion volcano" makes a great conversation piece.

Chip S. said...

Is that anything like the "baked-bean volcano"? Cuz I don't consider "Hey! WTF!" to be much of a conversation.

Freeman Hunt said...

When patrons at a restaurant are subjected to that mindless filth by some loudmouth at the next table, it is beyond rude.

That's not what happened though. He was talking to the reporter, and the guy at the next table started listening and laughing. So Morgan started playing more to that guy, then the guy's whole table started listening and laughing, so Morgan played to them all.

Lem said...

"I fell in love with Benihana because, if you sit at a table full of strangers and you don't say anything to anybody..."

"... you're an asshole...."


I agree.. ironically, sometimes I hated it if someone other than me draws the attention of my company.. but give me a few drinks and I will try to take over the room.

traditionalguy said...

Lem...Try hot sake. They say it's rice wine, but it works like grain alcohol.

lewsar said...

my then future wife and i had our first data at the benihana in the denver tech center.

i don't think either of us have been back since.

Alex said...

I'm with bagoh.

tim maguire said...

I went to Benihana's once.

When I was 18.

On a first date.

We sat across the table from a friend of my 15-year old brother, and his parents. Bit of a downer.

My intense dislike of Tracy Morgan comes from actual exposure to Tracy Morgan.

Blue@9 said...

The food is pretty mediocre for japanese, Imo, but Morgan is right that it's a social place. If you don't want to talk to anyone, it's best you go somewhere with private tables. My favorite bar is like this--the actual bar is horseshoe-shaped, so you're compelled to make eye contact and interact.

Peano said...
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Saint Croix said...

offensive to who?

he's hilarious.

Saint Croix said...

If you defend that mindless filth as "comedy" (stand-up or otherwise), you've got some character problems of your own.

So I go to this psychiatrist, and she says, "what's the matter?"

And I say, "I don't know. I'm laughing."

jeff said...

"And those were the only two tables in the restaurant?

If you defend that mindless filth as "comedy" (stand-up or otherwise), you've got some character problems of your own."


Clearly this jagoff is bound and determined in his Tracy Morgan hatred. If we had only known all comedy, conversations and generally interaction in a public place was to be run by you to determine acceptability, no doubt we would have done it. Got to love the guy who makes character judgements about other people based on their opinion of Tracy Morgan. I can only guess Morgan once ran over your dog. Or something.

Joe Schmoe said...

Jay Mohr does a great Tracy Morgan impression.

To me, being in Manhattan, eating some decent Asian food, AND sharing a table with Tracy Morgan would be an awesome time.

Joe Schmoe said...

Crack, I'm assuming the egg was hard-boiled? First time I read that, I thought "what a mess that must've made!" But the yolk's on me, I guess.