March 30, 2012

"J-Lo, can you scoot over a little bit?"

Telling Jennifer Lopez to move her sublime ass?

There really is only room for one female on the "American Idol" panel. Whenever they've squeezed in a second, they've wrecked the dynamic. Sorry to deal in stereotypes here, but the way the judges' panel has been structured since the first season, there's a woman, in the middle, performing a stereotypical female role. Paula Abdul pioneered this role, empathizing with everyone, speaking from the heart, and squealing special love for the boys. Paula got ousted, and other females had there time in the middle seat, but now they've got Jennifer, and Jennifer has far outstripped Paula. And I love Paula, but Jennifer is the queen.

She was low-key in her response to Nicki Minaj: "I don't know if there's enough room for both of us." A demure reference to her most famous body part, and a fully justified expression of intention to keep it firmly planted in the center seat.

15 comments:

traditionalguy said...

Hips can be big time weapons.

MayBee said...

The American Idol job is perfect for JLo. Her singing career had become an embarrassment, and her label dropped her. Her acting career had stalled. Personally, she was considered a difficult diva. But whatever else was going on, she was inexplicably becoming absolutely gorgeous.
Now she gets to sit at a table with good lighting and look gorgeous and seem nice. And at that, she rules.

Carol said...

It's true; there can be only One Woman. I wonder why that is.

Scott M said...

I have always wondered if J-Lo (or Ben for that matter) ever actually bumped into Matt And Trey at a Hollywood "do". I can't even begin to imagine the awkwardness.

MadisonMan said...

Why would a non-singing "performer" like Minaj appear on a singing competition show? To showcase her vocal vulnerabilities?

Totally pysched that Heejun got the boot. If DeAndre goes next, they'll have a great Top 7.

Robert said...

I thought Steven Tyler had the role of the woman on the American Idol judging panel

PatCA said...

I've liked J Lopez since her movie with Clooney, Out of Sight. It's too bad she went all urban or whatever (oh well, she made jillions) but her stint as judge reminded me that she is intelligent too.

Nicki let her lust for fame hang out. AI drives the music biz these days. Kind of desperate looking!

edutcher said...

Minaj is just jealous.

Ain't too many top-heavy black women.

And the top looks inflated.

Are we sure she's black?

bgates said...

Are we sure she's black?

I can never hear her without thinking of Linda Richman.

wv "ajudyn ntsista", which seems to confirm that she is Jewish not African-American.

rhhardin said...

Confession: I have no idea who J-Lo is.

NorthOfTheOneOhOne said...

I can see it now! "Battle of the Bootys!"

Jess said...

First off, a disclaimer: I have only seen a couple of JLo movies, and some of her AI judging stint.

Having said that, if she is in fact a diva, then she is also the world's greatest actress, coz I never get any vibe but nice from her.

Feel free to now make fun of my intelligence, eyesight, ancestry, grammar, etc.

Scott M said...

Feel free to now make fun of my intelligence, eyesight, ancestry, grammar, etc.

I suppose it all depends on your source, since none of us know her, in a biblical sense or otherwise. For my part, I consider South Park to be a better reference on pop culture than American Idol, so I think she's a self-centered, taco eating, bitch who decides to speak out of a 4th-grader's hand from time to time.

shirley elizabeth said...

It's not just American Idol that has the three person, trophy woman (usually one British male) panel. It's every talent show out there.

NotquiteunBuckley said...

Just saw a (partial) video of the 100 lamest (cheesiest?) movie quotes.

J-Lo, I think in Jersey Girl, is on the bed with legs moving apart and a certain look in her eye. Ben Affleck is sitting on the bed.

J-Lo: It's turkey time.

Ben: Turkey time?

J-Lo: Yeah, Turkey time. (looks down)

...

Gobble gobble.