November 21, 2012

"Question: What kind of dumbass packs a freaking grenade in his carry-on ... and accidentally tries to take it onto a plane?"

"Answer: Flaming Lips singer Wayne Coyne. And he shut down an Oklahoma City airport in the process."
According to reports, Coyne was flying to LAX to catch a preview of the new Flaming Lips musical "Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots" -- and told police he was given the dead grenade at a party as a joke.

Shocker, the grenade reportedly resulted in several missed flights ... and lots of wasted money -- but once TSA determined it was harmless, they let Coyne go.
Sorries duly tweeted:

ADDED: To demonstrate The Flaming Lips to Meade, I found "She Don't Use Jelly" in YouTube, where there are over 1500 comments, most of which seem to be new verses for the song — which is the kind of song that you can learn immediately and then make up your own words to off the top of your head in the style of the original. I know a girl who... etc. etc. It's easier than limericks. Try it!

Top comment at YouTube:
I know a King who likes to kill
in front of the public - coz it's such a thrill,
but he don't use nooses
and he don't need the police.
He don't use lions
or any of these.
He uses guuuu-iii-lll-otines
"She Don't Use Jelly" came out in 1993 — which was a fun year for watching TV around here. Wikipedia says:
According to Coyne, "The song came to me very quickly...."
I'll bet it did. Let's all strum a guitar, sing like a child (or is that singing like Neil Young?), and use just about the first silly words that come to mind and rhyme. The song got popular a year after its release when it was mocked on "Beavis and Butt-Head."
"You know the chick who makes you toast? Heh heh. So what?"

"I can make toast. Heh heh."

"Really."

"Uh oh. I think this is college music."...

"You know how you can tell this is college music? They're in a field."

"Yeah. Fields suck."
Fascinating how something supremely mockable, originally seen being mocked, gets to be thoroughly liked, and here is this band, 20 years later, still popular, making a musical, and that dumb, easy song is still their biggest hit. The mystery of American pop culture.

AND: I don't accept Coyne's tweeted apology. I want him to apologize by taking that hand grenade and getting a photograph of himself made in the pose of "Child with Toy Hand Grenade in Central Park" — by Diane Arbus:
Arbus captured this photograph by having the boy stand while moving around him, claiming she was trying to find the right angle. The boy became impatient and told her to "Take the picture already!" His expression conveys his exasperation and impatience with the whole endeavor, as the contact sheet for the shoot reveals. In other pictures, he is seen as a happy child.
But the picture became an icon of what's wrong with America — with its mentally ill attachment to weapons. It's not surprising that we're so bitter, and we cling to hand grenades and Anglican religion and we use Va-a-a-a-se-line.

51 comments:

Marshal said...

The story doesn't note whether the pin was remoived. How did Coyne know the grenade was dead?

chickelit said...

What kind of guy?

(a) Attention-seeking narcissist

(b) Brilliant provocateur, testing the stupidity of the TSA

(c) Airhead

McTriumph said...

He's a Oklahoma City celebrity, OKC has got The Flaming Lips, never heard of them. On the other hand Topeka has got Kansas.

Emil Blatz said...

doh!

SteveR said...

Are there different kinds of dumbasses?

Kevin said...

It was most likely one of the practice grenades we used in the army, with a large hole in the bottom, so you can see that it has nothing in it (also, the original reason for the hole is the practice grenades had like a blasting cap in them that timed and went off after you threw it, then the grenade was reusable for more practice). For practice they are painted baby blue but there is nothing that stops you from painting it green again. Also, once the cap has gone off, there is nothing to stop you from reassembling the spoon and putting the pin back in, so that your souveneir is complete (and can look very real, as long as you don't see the bottom).

I guess we should just feel relieved that the TSA actually found it.

EDH said...

"Uh-oh, I think this is college music."

Dumbass.

EDH said...

Althouse, stealing my thunder.

Dumbass.

Kevin said...

If it was a practice grenade then it is just a useless hunk of round hollowed out metal shell. Since it is iron it would hurt if you chucked it at somebody's head, but otherwise is as harmless as a baseball.

I still wouldn't put it in my suitcase but I guess I can see why somebody would think it didn't matter.

Rusty said...

"What about teenage girls?

They run from us.

Yeah. Like we had lizards in our trousers."

edutcher said...

What Kevin said about the TSA finding it.

Those people are better at groping (violating, really) women, intimidating and harrassing people, and making small children hate government than actually finding bad guys.

As for the moron, well,...

McTriumph said...

The article doesn't mention how long Coyne shut down the OKC airport. The SEIU is shutting down LAX today from 11:00 to 4:00. I wonder if the union members are wearing their purple t-shirts, if so an entrepreneur could make a very sizable profit selling baseball bats to travelers.

edutcher said...

Saw that, too, McT.

Well, Angelenos are really on a roll. They're getting what they voted for.

rcommal said...

Heh heh. Heh heh.

DADvocate said...

Grenades are always funny. Relax.

What's wrong with America is people always trying to make something wrong with America. Throw them a grenade.

EDH said...

"She Don't Use Jelly" came out in 1993 — which was a fun year for watching TV around here.

When Flaming Lips first came out, a curmudgeonly venue guy who wasn't known for taking the best care of himself and certainly didn't follow all the new (college) bands called the open act "Bleeding Gums" by mistake.

Still cracks me up.

rehajm said...

Fascinating how something supremely mockable, originally seen being mocked, gets to be thoroughly liked

camp. First you are extreme. Then the sophisticated appeal.

rcommal said...

So, crumbs in the Vaseline?

EDH said...

But the picture became an icon of what's wrong with America — with its mentally ill attachment to weapons. It's not surprising that we're so bitter, and we cling to hand grenades and Anglican religion and we use Va-a-a-a-se-line.

Uh oh, I think this is one of those college blogs.

ricpic said...

The first silly words that come to mind are often the best.

jacksonjay said...

A brilliant self-promoting asshole!

jacksonjay said...

Sorry dumbass!

bandmeeting said...

with its mentally ill attachment to weapons.

Or bathtubs and razor blades. Whatever.

MadisonMan said...

The SEIU is shutting down LAX today from 11:00 to 4:00

Fog is shutting down O'Hare. But it'll lift soon.

Michael said...

Sixty years ago every boy had one of these practice grenades. It was imperative to have grenades in the war games that were the staple of outdoor play. Grenades, helmets, patches from the theaters of war (China Burma India was my favorite)

I can see that the TSA would be gobsmacked by something so obviously harmless, that they would play this to the hilt. As our progressive friends would say, sad.

bgates said...

just a useless hunk of round hollowed out metal shell

Sounds like the TSA might have stopped him on suspicion of having kidnapped the Vice President.

rhhardin said...

It's a bureaucratic overreaction, not his fault.

Except that he should know that the bureaucracy will always overreact.

A dead grenade is easily proved to be dead.

School authorities today call the police if a kid has a gun charm bracelet charm.

As opposed to a functioning rifle club with meets with other high schools, as in my high school.

The Drill SGT said...

Marshal said...
The story doesn't note whether the pin was remoived. How did Coyne know the grenade was dead?


frag grenades have a grenade fuze assembly that can be unscrewed from the body.

http://www.globalsecurity.org/military/library/policy/army/fm/3-23-30/ch1.htm

This allows the use of alternative detonating mechanisms.

If I were asked to determine if a grenade were "live", i would unscrew the assembly, and determin if there was a bursting charge and if the grenade was filled or empty.

As folks have already said, US practice grenades have a big hole in the bottom

Clyde said...

When did the penny drop for Coyne that attempting to take a grenade (even a dead one) on an airplane was a bad idea?

EMD said...

I could've sworn Do You Realize was their biggest "hit."
or The W.A.N.D., which is a cool tune.

Coyne seems like a harmless eccentric dude.

MadisonMan said...

Coyne seems like a harmless eccentric dude.

Unlike TSA.

Perpetually perplexed said...

It's amazing Coyne wasn't charged with something, check out what happened at the Ted Stevens Int'l Airport Anchorage, Alaska

http://www.adn.com/2012/10/14/2660107/airport-evacuated-over-security.html

Sorry, don't know how to hyperlink

Such disparity!

AF said...

Althouse, you obviously aren't familiar with the Flaming Lips.

AF said...

The Flaming Lips is an excellent band with a large body of work. Like many strong rock bands, particularly of the last 15-20 years, they haven't had a lot of hit singles. "She Don't Use Jelly" is really not one of the first 10 things to spring to mind when you mention the Flaming Lips.

William said...

I can do an uncanny imitation of a dog dancing on its hind legs. It's very meta.

EMD said...

Most incidents like this are just people forgetting shit they put into a bag but should not have.

Airport auctions are pen knife nirvanas!

EMD said...

Maybe if she used jelly, she wouldn't have Flaming Lips!

William said...

He used to own a souvenir samurai sword shop at the Tokyo Airport, but business never took off.

McTriumph said...

Michael said...
Sixty years ago every boy had one of these practice grenades


I had a HS teacher in the late 60s, had one for a paper weight.

Sigivald said...

When it's, as Kevin says, an inert practice grenade that cannot in any way go boom, and is obviously so, then it's not "a grenade".

(And as Michael said, they're not some magic weird thing - I had one when I was, like, 10 or so.

Army surplus stores sold [and still sell] them - because they're harmless pieces of inert metal.

Given that real grenades aren't exactly in common criminal use in the US, there's no great danger of them being confused with real ones, either, unlike the more real bugaboo of the "very realistic fake gun".)

The Drill SGT said...

Army surplus stores sold [and still sell] them - because they're harmless pieces of inert metal.

Assuming that the fuze assembly inside the training grenade shell, no longer has a blasting cap attached :)

If it does, you'd not want the hole pointing at you when the 4 second fuze was up.

Nor would you want somebody to fill the hollow inside with something explosive.

KenK said...

On the brighter side of things Diane Arbus did us all a favor and committed suicide rather than produce more photos.

Fernandinande said...

"But the picture became an icon of what's wrong with America ..."

It was purposely, and pretty obviously, misleading, so it's not really an icon of anything except perhaps the way photographs can be misused.

"And he shut down an Oklahoma City airport in the process."

I doubt he could that. I'll take a wild guess: TSA shut down the airport.

Mary Beth said...

McTriumph said...

The article doesn't mention how long Coyne shut down the OKC airport. The SEIU is shutting down LAX today from 11:00 to 4:00. I wonder if the union members are wearing their purple t-shirts, if so an entrepreneur could make a very sizable profit selling baseball bats to travelers.


You can't carry a bat onto an airplane, even the mini Louisville Slugger souvenir bats.

Kevin said...

Nor would you want somebody to fill the hollow inside with something explosive.

Heh. Ok yeah people did that. They did stuff like put the cleaning rod down the barrel of an M-16 and then fire a blank too. Not recommended! Not funny either! Don't do that!

I can't imagine that an army surplus store would sell a practice grenade with a live blasting cap though. That was as controlled as normal ammo. If the store ever got one they'd likely just set it off themselves for the laughs, then sell the shell.

Astro said...

No Kentucky Jelly vs Vaseline jokes?
/Walks away disappointed.

Sam L. said...

Rock singer. Does something dumb ass. (But I repeat myself.)

Kevin said...

If it's not one of them practice hand grenades, it's close enough.

And since close enough only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades, we're still good!

Broomhandle said...

As many have noted a demilled hand grenade is easy to spot. My 12-year old has one sitting on his desk. Rather than deal with it in a rational manner,the TSA did what bureaucracies do best,shit themselves and victimize the people they're supposed to serve.

Broomhandle said...

As many have noted a demilled hand grenade is easy to spot. My 12-year old has one sitting on his desk. Rather than deal with it in a rational manner,the TSA did what bureaucracies do best,shit themselves and victimize the people they're supposed to serve.

McTriumph said...

Mary Beth said...
McTriumph said...

The article doesn't mention how long Coyne shut down the OKC airport. The SEIU is shutting down LAX today from 11:00 to 4:00. I wonder if the union members are wearing their purple t-shirts, if so an entrepreneur could make a very sizable profit selling baseball bats to travelers.

You can't carry a bat onto an airplane, even the mini Louisville Slugger souvenir bats.

True, but I believe the protest and traffic slow down were outside. Sometimes thugs only understand thuggery.