December 27, 2012

"Tired of being stopped at airports? Can you do without all the hassles of unreasonable arrests?"

"Had it up to here )) skeet (( *cut at the neck* with all those intolerable fines and inconsistently applied regulations and restrictions?" asks Chip Ahoy, offering these Official Washington, D.C. Gun Passes in sturdy laminate/sun proof colors/long lasting bands/Large holes for clear vision/slip proof:



26 comments:

Tim said...

Sure, but then, even the tools working for the TSA will think you're a tool.

No thanks.

X-Ray my clothed body naked instead, please.

Much more dignity in that than in trying to pass as David Gregory.

Surfed said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Surfed said...

Now THAT's some funny shit.

Synova said...

That is brilliant.

virgil xenophon said...

Chip Ahoy: National Treasure--Prince (too young to be King) of the Imps!--Ann, let's give this guy some wider pub! Start linking him to Instsy if you don't already..

Methadras said...

Way to go Chip. Another Bravo.

edutcher said...

You could always go the faux Moochelle route like the Candydate.

Danno said...

Excellent!

Too bad David Gregory is so prematurely gray.

Bob said...

Chip, you so won the thread that you got your very own.

harrogate said...

Oh, that Chip.

Borepatch said...

We must close the "Talk Show Loophole".

Lem said...

I'm speechless.

Lem said...

Sooo...

This is how Chip became the #1 commenter.

He turns things out.

Cedarford said...

Well..we don't know yet about how the DC flap will play out. We don't even know who at NBC had the bright idea of getting the prop - or what hapless flunky or rich producer actually got it and under law , "was in possession of it".

If Gregory was just the puppet scripted by a producer that orchestrated the whole thing..and his role was just to wave the magazine on air after a flunky gave it to him and retrieved it, he is completely off the hook.

Contrary to some people's belief, just touching or holding up illegal items does not confer "legal cooties". Possession is a different thing.

On the other hand, if it was all Gregory's idea and by power or money he used strawman/women agencies to fetch him his showpiece and blew off DC cops saying not to bring it into DC, then Gregory is on the hook.

And I wouldn't presume that Gregory or the wealthy producers at NBC, who dine with the Obamas - will escape of privilege of the powerful.
I think the NRA is casting about for any tales of lower rabble in the masses of American proles that arrested and punished hard by the Heroes of Law Enforcement for a stray round of ammo found on them or a storekeep robbed and beaten several times - then "nailed" by the Heroes for having an empty shotgun in his store..

They would love to point out how the rich and powerful want to take weapons from citizens but retain their government or private armed guards or who have the clout to demand and get a weapons permit from DC or Mayor Bloomberg in NYC or with an endorsement letter from Diane Feinstein or Chuck Schumer.

Lem said...

Stormin' Norman passed away?

Synova said...

"Contrary to some people's belief, just touching or holding up illegal items does not confer "legal cooties". Possession is a different thing."

True.

I found a little baggie of crystal meth once... called the cops to come get it. Didn't get arrested. No legal cooties.

But if I'd gone out and bought a baggie of crystal meth so that I could show my kids so that they'd know what it was and that it is illegal... my heart was pure and my intentions educational... I think I'd have legal cooties from here to tomorrow.

wyo sis said...

Chip Ahoy
I think you have legal cooties on this.
Well played.

Lem said...

Althouse was asking before why the gun prop was so important to he who must be immune.

After mauling it over a bit, the only thing I can come up with is that David Gregory wanted to reach what Rush Limbaugh calls "low information" viewers... and he felt that in order to reach them, he needed a visual aid, a hook.

David Gregory was selling... 'big magazine = bad... little magazine, still bad but not as bad as big magazine.'
Notice he went with the same note/ theme as La Pier - "the only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun".

But David said, wait a minute, wait just a dog on minute... I have to go a little further...

I got something to show you. A Perry Mason moment.

But the problem with the stunt is that he was selling its defectiveness if you will... its quite tricky to do that... but it can be done with some ingenuity and imagination.

And then there is the problem of the Alternative David Gregory offers... I mean, the smaller magazine is the answer?
Was David Gregory living under a rock while they were trying to drag people off their SUVs?

Smaller has Never been THE answer to any problem, Ever!

David Gregory shut himself on the foot there... epic fail.

Mick Havoc said...

Chip, I am getting really tired of your stuff.

This is at least the 3rd time you have made me wet myself laughing.

Chip Ahoy said...

Ha ha ha I forgot about this. Just came back and saw it again. I crack myself up.

Chip Ahoy said...

"No. It doesn't look that threatening to me. If that's what you were thinking. No. It just doesn't."

"What do you mean? Are you insane? This magazine holds thirty rounds."

"So."

"So? So? So? Is that all you got? It holds thirty!"

"So. It's small. Looks like a PEZ dispenser to me."

"WHAT? So, this is amusing to you? You find this amusing."

Humperdink said...

I can see it now. Washington DC defense attorney puts his feloniously charged gun toting defendant on the witness stand. Calmly reaches into his briefcase and pulls out the David Gregory laminate, sun-proof mask (the non-smiling model) and fits it to his clients face ......

Surfed said...

Well it's on Facebook...

BF said...

If Gregory was just the puppet scripted by a producer that orchestrated the whole thing..and his role was just to wave the magazine on air after a flunky gave it to him and retrieved it, he is completely off the hook.

100% disagree. Possession == Possession.

We have it on tape that Gregory possessed the offending piece of hardware in the forbidden zone. Therefore, he's guilty. The producer/puppeteer may be guilty as well, but that does not affect Mr. Gregory's culpability in the slightest.

Andy Freeman said...

> If Gregory was just the puppet scripted by a producer that orchestrated the whole thing..and his role was just to wave the magazine on air after a flunky gave it to him and retrieved it, he is completely off the hook.

So if a gang-banger hands a some drugs or a gun to his moll to hold, you think that she's off the hook?

Possession laws don't work that way.

Other NBC staff may have also broken the law, but Gregory certainly did.

Based on past behavior by journalists, I'm far less dangerous so if he gets a pass for possessing such a magazine in DC, so should I.

Old Radar Tech said...

Are you claiming he just "found" a mag in the studio?
Anxiously awaiting the televised SWAT raid, then.